Now that He is  a New York Jet, as well as a Second String Quarterback, things just seem…

…different.

He doesn’t appear to be as motivated and happy as he was throughout the entire 10 years I knew him.

I realize that it has been about a couple of years since he and I were together, and it may just be a matter of adapting to different situations and surroundings.

Even though Mike and I have moved on from our relationship and forward with our  lives,  it’s still hard not to notice current situations.  I know for sure that certain people in Mike’s ”Circle” are aware of the book, “Quarterback Keeper” and it’s content, and have made that very clear.   There is also subject matter in the book that is very graphic and detail oriented, and once read, would be hard not to speak on.  There have been interviews and media coverage regarding the book that have put our story in a certain accessible and unavoidable spotlight as well .

After being a part of Mike’s world for so long, there are things that I come across even now, that are hard for me not speak on.

Mike and I had such a strong bond for so long that it still resonates from a “concerned” place within my heart.  Even though I am no longer “in love” with him (and haven’t been for while), I still care about him and his well being.  I’m not sure if that connection will ever truly go away on it’s own.  I never wanted more from Vick then what we have already shared.  Those are chapters in my life that I have no desire to repeat or relive again.  As exciting and romantic as it was, that story has been written and a new one has captured my attention.

Quarterback Keeper is an amazing read.  There is pleasure, fear, pain, joy, desire, temptation, deceit, and more in one captivating book.  If you like sports, romance, comedy, or drama then you will enjoy reading Quarterback Keeper Book.  If you simply want to know more about Mike Vick then what you thought you already knew, then it’s well worth reading.  And if you simply just want to get to know me as well, Bella Escritor…

then reading this book, is a perfect way to start.

As the Author of QUARTERBACK KEEPER, I’ve been asked numerous times what my favorite part of the book is?

The chapter that is dearest to my heart is the chapter where I had to say goodbye to Vick before he turned himself in to serve his time in Federal prison.  At that point in our relationship we had become closer than we ever imagined we would be.   He was at one of his lowest points, and I was right there by his side, providing him with the unconditional support he so desperately needed.

Even though I didn’t agree with his lifestyle decisions that put him in that predicament, I still provided my lover and best friend with a supportive shoulder to lean on. He had to know at that point that I was in it for the long run, with or without the fame, fortune, and glory that accompanied him when we first met.

I was always smiling throughout our relationship. That was just my personality, and one of the things about me that captured Vicks heart.  Even on the verge of tears over the realization of him going to prison, I still kept my smile intact.  I knew he needed to see the normalcy that he had grown accustomed to from me.

(The photo below was taken the same night Vick decided to turn himself in and begin serving his time.  I was smiling so damn hard.  One of those smiles people force to keep from crying; And I felt like Vick was saving face for me as well, knowing where he was headed for about two years).

My heart was breaking, but my mind was telling me to keep it together for him.

Vick was within hours of heading to prison and he was right there with me, making sure I was ok, and that we would continue to be ok.

The moment he left, he immediately took my smile with him.  The tears could no longer stand their ground.  I had centered my world around him, and now my world was leaving me.  It hurt like hell.

I had been flying back and forth from ATL to VA while he was doing community service and falling from grace in terms of his career and character in the media. It seemed that everywhere I went I heard mention of how inevitable prison was for Vick.  But it was only in that instant where he finally walked out the door that night, that it all became too real.

Other than with my kids, I had never in my life felt myself loving someone that strongly and sincerely before. It scared me how much I was effected by him.  I was terrified that I wouldn’t get through it.  I was worried that I wouldn’t be strong enough to get him through it like he was counting on.

Losing him wasn’t the issue, but losing my strong willed self in the process was.  This man had captured my heart and soul and was taking both parts of me with him to prison.

He had other people in his life, and so did I, but we had no one the way we had each other.  No one.  To this day, it’s hard for people to understand how strong of a connection Vick and I really had.  Some people try to compare what they have with him to what we had with each other, and they don’t even come close.  So they have often become envious with the realization that he had my support when theirs wasn’t enough.

While others who were aware and witnessed our connection for themselves, respected and admired it for what it truly was.

As the story goes on, you will find out exactly what got us through it all.  You will also find out how much closer we became as well.  Some of the best years we shared, were still yet to come, and they were amazing.

To this day, whenever I am going thru something challenging I look at that same picture of Mike and Myself, and I just smile my way through it.  Thinking this too shall pass.  Just like it did for us both back then .

Even though my smile belongs to someone else now, I am still very proud of what Vick has learned and overcome.

 I am happy for him and wish him the best life has to offer.  Even more so, I am proud of myself.

I believe everything happens for reason, and that people are often put into your life for a strong purpose as well.

I will never regret any parts of the ten years of my life that I spent with Michael Vick.

I also hope that he finally realizes that all the smiles that remain around him are not always sincere; But that’s his lesson to learn now.  I can’t “keep” watch over the Quarterback any longer than I already have.

People now question my loyalty due to the fact that I have written a book that tells tons of secrets that he and I shared with one another.

My answer to that question of  loyalty is:

Yes I am a loyal person, a ride or die chick as some might say. Michael was right to trust me like he did and for as long as he did.  I wrote the book  to protect myself.   Although I am loyal to those I love and care for, I cannot forget to have my own back.

While protecting myself, I still somehow found a way to do so by protecting Michael once again as well when considering the content I would put inside of the book itself.

Someone close to Vick told me that they would soon become disloyal to him and as an added extra, the version of my life that they knew of would also be exposed.  I had Michael Vick’s  back for so long, against the people who called family and friends, that I had forgotten to protect myself from them as well.

So after ending my relationship with Mike, there was no longer a hands on need to put his concerns front and center in my life anymore.  In the book, you will read my reasons for ending my relationship with Mike and get a more detailed understanding of my need to  finally look out for myself.

If anyone was going to talk about ten entire years of my life and be 100% truthful, I knew it had to come from me and me alone.  I already knew that Michael was not the type of person to stand up for himself, let alone anyone else when it came to the people closest to him.  I learned that from past experiences that I had witnessed myself.

As much as I loved him, I loved myself even more.  I loved my kids, my family, my friends, and the thought of them hearing our love story in a twisted and vindictive manner was nothing I could tolerate.

So there you have it.  I did not write “Quarterback Keeper” to hurt, promote, or gain attention to or from Michael Vick.  I wrote it to protect my version of 10 years of my life that happened to have been overwhelmingly consumed by Michael Vick.  I thank you for reading this and taking time out to get my point of view.

I hope that you read the book in it’s entirety and get to know the Michael Vick I knew, and the Kiana (Bella Escritor), he knew for so long.

What we had was not a fairy tale, but a real life love story that doesn’t quite happen that way, that often, if ever.

–Bella Escritor (Kiana).